News!! (sorta)

So, here's the scoop. As some of you may know (that is, if anyone actually reads this. Helloooo??), I had a relapse in my Takayasu's last September-ish and have been taking steps to make this better (i.e. going back on Prednisone and getting periodic CAT Scans/MRIs to check my progress). Just before New Year's I had a CAT scan that showed improvement, so my Dr. started a tapering regimine to eventually get me off the Prednisone (you can't just quit it cold turkey as it tends to do damage to the adrenal gland - man, have I done my research!). Well, during this time, I started experiencing a new pain in the same general area as my inflammation and was worried that my body was not reacting well to the tapering and the inflammation was coming back - or worse, spreading. This has been going on for about a month with good days and bad days (if I've cancelled some sort of social engagement on you, a bad day was most likely the cause, and I apologize for the wierdness of my innards), and about 2 weeks ago, I got another MRI. I was due for one anyway because of the tapering thing, and my Dr. suggested I get it sooner rather than later because of this pain. Well, after nearly two weeks of me nagging the hell out of the people at his office cause he wasn't calling me with results, he finally called me back yesterday (funny story about how my mom was involved in this - maybe later I'll tell it). The good news is that apparently there isn't any inflammation to speak of anymore and the blood flow in the whole area looks good, so he didn't see any reason for me to go back up on my dosage but wants me to stay put for a while (which I'm totally cool with). The bad news is, I STILL HAVE NO IDEA WHY I AM HURTING!!! Everyone has their theories. My mom says she's experienced similar pain before but it went away on its own. My dad said he's had pain in the exact same area and it was his trapezias (sp?) muscle, which had gotten tense from stress and developed all these little knots, and after he started getting massages the pain went away. My own theory (the TA rearing its ugly head) was just shot to pieces with the results of this MRI. Don't get me wrong, I'm VERY glad it's not that. I just wish I knew what it WAS!!

But anyway, I have another appt. to see my (not-so) trusty specialist in a couple weeks to see if he can't figure something out. If not, I guess it's back to the drawing board. Maybe I'll try massage (lord knows I could use a few of these anyway!) to see if that helps. Or maybe I'll just live on Advil for the rest of my life!! Hah!! :)

(BTW, I totally overuse parentheses, in case you couldn't tell!!)
H

and Mooooovies!!

This one I had to guess at the instructions for, so ...

bold the ones you've seen
bold and ** the ones you own
(I couldn't figure out what the italics were supposed to signify, other than started and not finished, or seen parts of, but I don't wanna do that)
add 3 more at the bottom
post on your blog

... at least, that's what I'm doing ...

01. Trainspotting
02. Shrek**
03. M
04. Dogma
05. Strictly Ballroom
06. The Princess Bride**
07. Love Actually
08. The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring **
09. The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers**
10. The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King**
11. Reservoir Dogs
12. Desperado
13. Swordfish
14. Kill Bill Vol. 1
15. Donnie Darko
16. Spirited Away
17. Better Than Sex
18. Sleepy Hollow
19. Pirates of the Caribbean**
20. The Eye
21. Requiem for a Dream
22. Dawn of the Dead (the remake)
23. The Pillow Book
24. The Italian Job (the remake)
25. Goonies**
26. Baseketball
27. The Spice Girls Movie
28. Army of Darkness
29. The Color Purple
30. The Saftey of Objects
31. Can't Hardly Wait
32. Mystic Pizza
33. Finding Nemo
34. Monsters Inc.**
35. Circle of Friends
36. Mary Poppins
37. The Bourne Identity
38. Forrest Gump
39. A Clockwork Orange
40. Kindergarten Cop
41. On The Line
42. My Big Fat Greek Wedding
43. Final Destination
44. Sorority Boys
45. Urban Legend
46. Cheaper by the Dozen (original version)
47. Fierce Creatures
48. Dude, Where's My Car
49. Ladyhawke
50. Ghostbusters
51. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
52. Back to the Future
53. An Affair To Remember
54. Somewhere In Time
55. North By Northwest
56. Moulin Rouge **
57. Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets**
58. The Wizard of Oz
59. Zoolander
60. A Walk to Remember
61. Chicago
62. Vanilla Sky
63. The Sweetest Thing
64. Don't Tell Mom the Babysitters Dead
65. The Nightmare Before Christmas**
66. Chasing Amy
67. Edward Scissorhands**
68. Adventures of Priscilla: Queen of the Desert
69. Muriel's Wedding
70. Croupier
71. Blade Runner
72. Cruel Intentions
73. Ocean's Eleven
74. Magnolia
75. Fight Club
76. Beauty and The Beast** (Which one?? Seen several versions, actually, and own the Disney animated one.)
77. Much Ado About Nothing
78. Dirty Dancing
79. Gladiator
80. Ever After**
81. Braveheart
82. What Lies Beneath
83. Regarding Henry
84. The Dark Crystal**
85. Star Wars
86 The Birds
87. Beaches
88. Cujo
89. Maid In Manhattan
90. Labyrinth**
91. Thoroughly Modern Millie
92. His Girl Friday
93. Chocolat
94. Independence Day
95. Singing in the Rain
96. Big Fish
97. The Thomas Crown Affair
98. The Matrix
99. Stargate
100. A Hard Day's Night
101. About A Boy
102. Jurassic Park
103. Life of Brian
104. Dune
105. Event Horizon
106. Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels
107. Dead Fire
108. The Neverending Story**
109. Resident Evil
110. Lara Croft: Tomb Raider
111. Pure Country
112. The Evil Dead
113. The Stand
114. Head
115. Shoujo Kakumei Utena: ADOLESCENCE Mokushiroku
116. The Ghost Goes Gear
117. Perfect Blue
118. Bring It On
119. Cowboy Bebop: Knockin' on Heaven's Door
120. Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
121. Down With Love**
122. Velvet Goldmine
123. Dead Calm
124. Empire Strikes Back
125. The 400 Blows**
126. The Princess Bride**
127. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind**

Booooooks!!!

bold those you've read
italicise started-but-never-finished
** those you own but haven't gotten to yet
add three of your own
post to your blog

1. The Lord of the Rings, JRR Tolkien
2. Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen
3. His Dark Materials, Philip Pullman
4. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Douglas Adams
5. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, JK Rowling
6. To Kill a Mockingbird, Harper Lee
7. **Winnie the Pooh, AA Milne**
8. 1984, George Orwell
9. The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, CS Lewis
10. Jane Eyre, Charlotte Bronte
11. **Catch-22, Joseph Heller**
12. Wuthering Heights, Emily Bronte
13. Birdsong, Sebastian Faulks
14. Rebecca, Daphne du Maurier
15. The Catcher in the Rye, JD Salinger
16. The Wind in the Willows, Kenneth Grahame
17. Great Expectations, Charles Dickens
18. Little Women, Louisa May Alcott
19. Captain Corelli's Mandolin, Louis de Bernieres
20. War and Peace, Leo Tolstoy
21. Gone with the Wind, Margaret Mitchell
22. Harry Potter And The Sorcerer's Stone, JK Rowling
23. Harry Potter And The Chamber Of Secrets, JK Rowling
24. Harry Potter And The Prisoner Of Azkaban, JK Rowling
25. The Hobbit, JRR Tolkien
26. Tess Of The D'Urbervilles, Thomas Hardy
27. Middlemarch, George Eliot
28. A Prayer For Owen Meany, John Irving
29. The Grapes Of Wrath, John Steinbeck
30. **Alice's Adventures In Wonderland, Lewis Carroll**
31. The Story Of Tracy Beaker, Jacqueline Wilson
32. One Hundred Years Of Solitude, Gabriel Garcia Marquez
33. The Pillars Of The Earth, Ken Follett
34. David Copperfield, Charles Dickens
35. Charlie And The Chocolate Factory, Roald Dahl
36. **Treasure Island, Robert Louis Stevenson**
37. A Town Like Alice, Nevil Shute
38. Persuasion, Jane Austen
39. Dune, Frank Herbert
40. Emma, Jane Austen
41. Anne Of Green Gables, LM Montgomery
42. Watership Down, Richard Adams
43. The Great Gatsby, F Scott Fitzgerald
44. The Count Of Monte Cristo, Alexandre Dumas
45. Brideshead Revisited, Evelyn Waugh
46. Animal Farm, George Orwell
47. A Christmas Carol, Charles Dickens
48. Far From The Madding Crowd, Thomas Hardy
49. Goodnight Mister Tom, Michelle Magorian
50. The Shell Seekers, Rosamunde Pilcher
51. The Secret Garden, Frances Hodgson Burnett
52. Of Mice And Men, John Steinbeck
53. The Stand, Stephen King
54. **Anna Karenina, Leo Tolstoy**
55. A Suitable Boy, Vikram Seth
56. The BFG, Roald Dahl
57. Swallows And Amazons, Arthur Ransome
58. **Black Beauty, Anna Sewell**
59. Artemis Fowl, Eoin Colfer
60. Crime And Punishment, Fyodor Dostoyevsky
61. Noughts And Crosses, Malorie Blackman
62. **Memoirs Of A Geisha, Arthur Golden**
63. A Tale Of Two Cities, Charles Dickens
64. The Thorn Birds, Colleen McCollough
65. Mort, Terry Pratchett
66. The Magic Faraway Tree, Enid Blyton
67. The Magus, John Fowles
68. Good Omens, Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman
69. Guards! Guards!, Terry Pratchett
70. Lord Of The Flies, William Golding
71. Perfume, Patrick Susskind
72. The Ragged Trousered Philanthropists, Robert Tressell
73. Night Watch, Terry Pratchett
74. Matilda, Roald Dahl
75. Bridget Jones's Diary, Helen Fielding
76. The Secret History, Donna Tartt
77. The Woman In White, Wilkie Collins
78. Ulysses, James Joyce
79. Bleak House, Charles Dickens
80. Double Act, Jacqueline Wilson
81. The Twits, Roald Dahl
82. I Capture The Castle, Dodie Smith
83. Holes, Louis Sachar
84. Gormenghast, Mervyn Peake
85. The God Of Small Things, Arundhati Roy
86. Vicky Angel, Jacqueline Wilson
87. Brave New World, Aldous Huxley
88. Cold Comfort Farm, Stella Gibbons
89. Magician, Raymond E Feist
90. On The Road, Jack Kerouac
91. The Godfather, Mario Puzo
92. The Clan Of The Cave Bear, Jean M Auel
93. The Colour Of Magic, Terry Pratchett
94. The Alchemist, Paulo Coelho
95. Katherine, Anya Seton
96. Kane And Abel, Jeffrey Archer
97. Love In The Time Of Cholera, Gabriel Garcia Marquez
98. Girls In Love, Jacqueline Wilson
99. The Princess Diaries, Meg Cabot
100. Midnight's Children, Salman Rushdie
101. Three Men In A Boat, Jerome K. Jerome
102. Small Gods, Terry Pratchett
103. The Beach, Alex Garland
104. Dracula, Bram Stoker
105. Point Blanc, Anthony Horowitz
106. The Pickwick Papers, Charles Dickens
107. Stormbreaker, Anthony Horowitz
108. The Wasp Factory, Iain Banks
109. The Day Of The Jackal, Frederick Forsyth
110. The Illustrated Mum, Jacqueline Wilson
111. Jude The Obscure, Thomas Hardy
112. The Secret Diary Of Adrian Mole Aged 13 1/2, Sue Townsend
113. The Cruel Sea, Nicholas Monsarrat
114. Les Miserables, Victor Hugo
115. The Mayor Of Casterbridge, Thomas Hardy
116. The Dare Game, Jacqueline Wilson
117. Bad Girls, Jacqueline Wilson
118. The Picture Of Dorian Gray, Oscar Wilde
119. Shogun, James Clavell
120. The Day Of The Triffids, John Wyndham
121. Lola Rose, Jacqueline Wilson
122. Vanity Fair, William Makepeace Thackeray
123. The Forsyte Saga, John Galsworthy
124. House Of Leaves, Mark Z. Danielewski
125. The Poisonwood Bible, Barbara Kingsolver
126. Reaper Man, Terry Pratchett
127. Angus, Thongs And Full-Frontal Snogging, Louise Rennison
128. The Hound Of The Baskervilles, Arthur Conan Doyle
129. Possession, A. S. Byatt
130. The Master And Margarita, Mikhail Bulgakov
131. The Handmaid's Tale, Margaret Atwood
132. Danny The Champion Of The World, Roald Dahl
133. East Of Eden, John Steinbeck
134. George's Marvellous Medicine, Roald Dahl
135. Wyrd Sisters, Terry Pratchett
136. The Color Purple, Alice Walker
137. Hogfather, Terry Pratchett
138. The Thirty-Nine Steps, John Buchan
139. Girls In Tears, Jacqueline Wilson
140. Sleepovers, Jacqueline Wilson
141. All Quiet On The Western Front, Erich Maria Remarque
142. Behind The Scenes At The Museum, Kate Atkinson
143. High Fidelity, Nick Hornby
144. It, Stephen King
145. James And The Giant Peach, Roald Dahl
146. The Green Mile, Stephen King
147. Papillon, Henri Charriere
148. Men At Arms, Terry Pratchett
149. Master And Commander, Patrick O'Brian
150. Skeleton Key, Anthony Horowitz
151. Soul Music, Terry Pratchett
152. Thief Of Time, Terry Pratchett
153. The Fifth Elephant, Terry Pratchett
154. Atonement, Ian McEwan
155. Secrets, Jacqueline Wilson
156. The Silver Sword, Ian Serraillier
157. **One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest, Ken Kesey**
158. Heart Of Darkness, Joseph Conrad
159. Kim, Rudyard Kipling
160. Cross Stitch, Diana Gabaldon
161. Moby Dick, Herman Melville
162. River God, Wilbur Smith
163. Sunset Song, Lewis Grassic Gibbon
164. The Shipping News, Annie Proulx
165. The World According To Garp, John Irving
166. Lorna Doone, R. D. Blackmore
167. Girls Out Late, Jacqueline Wilson
168. The Far Pavilions, M. M. Kaye
169. The Witches, Roald Dahl
170. Charlotte's Web, E. B. White
171. Frankenstein, Mary Shelley
172. They Used To Play On Grass, Terry Venables and Gordon Williams
173. The Old Man And The Sea, Ernest Hemingway
174. The Name Of The Rose, Umberto Eco
175. Sophie's World, Jostein Gaarder
176. Dustbin Baby, Jacqueline Wilson
177. Fantastic Mr. Fox, Roald Dahl
178. Lolita, Vladimir Nabokov
179. Jonathan Livingstone Seagull, Richard Bach
180. The Little Prince, Antoine De Saint-Exupery
181. The Suitcase Kid, Jacqueline Wilson
182. Oliver Twist, Charles Dickens
183. The Power Of One, Bryce Courtenay
184. Silas Marner, George Eliot
185. American Psycho, Bret Easton Ellis
186. The Diary Of A Nobody, George and Weedon Gross-mith
187. Trainspotting, Irvine Welsh
188. Goosebumps, R. L. Stine
189. Heidi, Johanna Spyri (Yeah, I have about 5 copies of this one...)
190. Sons And Lovers, D. H. Lawrence
191. The Unbearable Lightness of Being, Milan Kundera
192. Man And Boy, Tony Parsons
193. The Truth, Terry Pratchett
194. The War Of The Worlds, H. G. Wells
195. The Horse Whisperer, Nicholas Evans
196. A Fine Balance, Rohinton Mistry
197. Witches Abroad, Terry Pratchett
198. The Once And Future King, T. H. White
199. The Very Hungry Caterpillar, Eric Carle
200. Flowers In The Attic, Virginia Andrews
201. The Silmarillion, J.R.R. Tolkien
202. The Eye of the World, Robert Jordan
203. The Great Hunt, Robert Jordan
204. The Dragon Reborn, Robert Jordan
205. Fires of Heaven, Robert Jordan
206. Lord of Chaos, Robert Jordan
207. Winter's Heart, Robert Jordan
208. A Crown of Swords, Robert Jordan
209. Crossroads of Twilight, Robert Jordan
210. A Path of Daggers, Robert Jordan
211. As Nature Made Him, John Colapinto
212. Microserfs, Douglas Coupland
213. The Married Man, Edmund White
214. Winter's Tale, Mark Helprin
215. The History of Sexuality, Michel Foucault
216. Cry to Heaven, Anne Rice
217. Same-Sex Unions in Premodern Europe, John Boswell
218. Equus, Peter Shaffer
219. The Man Who Ate Everything, Jeffrey Steingarten
220. Letters To A Young Poet, Rainer Maria Rilke
221. Ella Minnow Pea, Mark Dunn
222. The Vampire Lestat, Anne Rice
223. Anthem, Ayn Rand
224. The Bridge To Terabithia, Katherine Paterson
225. Tartuffe, Moliere
226. The Metamorphosis, Franz Kafka
227. The Crucible, Arthur Miller
228. The Trial, Franz Kafka
229. Oedipus Rex, Sophocles
230. Oedipus at Colonus, Sophocles
231. Death Be Not Proud, John Gunther
232. A Doll's House, Henrik Ibsen
233. Hedda Gabler, Henrik Ibsen
234. Ethan Frome, Edith Wharton
235. A Raisin In The Sun, Lorraine Hansberry
236. ALIVE!, Piers Paul Read
237. Grapefruit, Yoko Ono
238. Trickster Makes This World, Lewis Hyde
239. The Mists of Avalon, Marion Zimmer Bradley
240. Chronicles of Thomas Convenant, Unbeliever, Stephen Donaldson
241. Lord of Light, Roger Zelazny
242. The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier & Clay, Michael Chabon
243. Summerland, Michael Chabon
244. A Confederacy of Dunces, John Kennedy Toole
245. Candide, Voltaire
246. The Wonderful Story of Henry Sugar and Six More, Roald Dahl
247. Ringworld, Larry Niven
248. The King Must Die, Mary Renault
249. Stranger in a Strange Land, Robert Heinlein
250. A Wrinkle in Time, Madeline L'Engle
251. The Eyre Affair, Jasper Fforde
252. The House Of The Seven Gables, Nathaniel Hawthorne
253. The Scarlet Letter, Nathaniel Hawthorne
254. The Joy Luck Club, Amy Tan
255. The Great Gilly Hopkins, Katherine Paterson
256. Chocolate Fever, Robert Kimmel Smith
257. Xanth: The Quest for Magic, Piers Anthony
258. The Lost Princess of Oz, L. Frank Baum
259. Wonder Boys, Michael Chabon
260. Lost In A Good Book, Jasper Fforde
261. Well Of Lost Plots, Jasper Fforde
262. Life Of Pi, Yann Martel
263. The Bean Trees, Barbara Kingsolver
264. A Yellow Rraft In Blue Water, Michael Dorris
265. Little House on the Prairie, Laura Ingalls Wilder
266. Where The Red Fern Grows, Wilson Rawls
267. Griffin & Sabine, Nick Bantock
268. Witch of Black Bird Pond, Joyce Friedland
269. Mrs. Frisby And The Rats Of NIMH, Robert C. O'Brien
270. Tuck Everlasting, Natalie Babbitt
271. The Cay, Theodore Taylor
272. From The Mixed-Up Files Of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler, E.L. Konigsburg
273. The Phantom Tollbooth, Norton Jester
274. The Westing Game, Ellen Raskin
275. The Kitchen God's Wife, Amy Tan
276. The Bone Setter's Daughter, Amy Tan
277. Relic, Duglas Preston & Lincolon Child
278. Wicked, Gregory Maguire
279. American Gods, Neil Gaiman
280. Misty of Chincoteague, Marguerite Henry
281. The Girl Next Door, Jack Ketchum
282. Haunted, Judith St. George
283. Singularity, William Sleator
284. A Short History of Nearly Everything, Bill Bryson
285. Different Seasons, Stephen King
286. Fight Club, Chuck Palahniuk
287. **About a Boy, Nick Hornby**
288. The Bookman's Wake, John Dunning
289. The Church of Dead Girls, Stephen Dobyns
290. Illusions, Richard Bach
291. Magic's Pawn, Mercedes Lackey
292. Magic's Promise, Mercedes Lackey
293. Magic's Price, Mercedes Lackey
294. The Dancing Wu Li Masters, Gary Zukav
295. Spirits of Flux and Anchor, Jack L. Chalker
296. **Interview with the Vampire, Anne Rice**
297. The Encyclopedia of Unusual Sex Practices, Brenda Love
298. Infinite Jest, David Foster Wallace
299. The Bluest Eye, Toni Morrison
300. The Cider House Rules, John Irving
301. Ender's Game, Orson Scott Card
302. Girlfriend in a Coma, Douglas Coupland
303. The Lion's Game, Nelson Demille
304. The Sun, The Moon, and the Stars, Stephen Brust
305. Cyteen, C. J. Cherryh
306. Foucault's Pendulum, Umberto Eco
307. Cryptonomicon, Neal Stephenson
308. Invisible Monsters, Chuck Palahniuk
309. Camber of Culdi, Kathryn Kurtz
310. The Fountainhead, Ayn Rand
311. War and Rememberance, Herman Wouk
312. The Art of War, Sun Tzu
313. The Giver, Lois Lowry
314. The Telling, Ursula Le Guin
315. Xenogenesis (or Lilith's Brood), Octavia Butler
316. A Civil Campaign, Lois McMaster Bujold
317. The Curse of Chalion, Lois McMaster Bujold
318. The Aeneid, Publius Vergilius Maro (Vergil)
319. Hanta Yo, Ruth Beebe Hill
320. The Princess Bride, S. Morganstern (or William Goldman)
321. Beowulf, Anonymous
322. The Sparrow, Maria Doria Russell
323. Deerskin, Robin McKinley
324. Dragonsong, Anne McCaffrey
325. Passage, Connie Willis
326. Otherland, Tad Williams
327. Tigana, Guy Gavriel Kay
328. Number the Stars, Lois Lowry
329. Beloved, Toni Morrison
330. Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal, Christopher Moore
331. The mysterious disappearance of Leon, I mean Noel, Ellen Raskin
332. Summer Sisters, Judy Blume
333. The Hunchback of Notre Dame, Victor Hugo
334. The Island on Bird Street, Uri Orlev
335. Midnight in the Dollhouse, Marjorie Filley Stover
336. The Miracle Worker, William Gibson
337. The Genesis Code, John Case
338. The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, Robert Louis Stevensen
339. Paradise Lost, John Milton
340. Phantom, Susan Kay
341. The Mummy or Ramses the Damned, Anne Rice
342. Anno Dracula, Kim Newman
343: The Dresden Files: Grave Peril, Jim Butcher
344: Tokyo Suckerpunch, Issac Adamson
345: The Winter of Magic's Return, Pamela Service
346: The Oddkins, Dean R. Koontz
347. My Name is Asher Lev, Chaim Potok
348. The Last Goodbye, Raymond Chandler
349. At Swim, Two Boys, Jaime O'Neill
350. Othello, by William Shakespeare
351. The Collected Poems of Dylan Thomas
352. The Collected Poems of William Butler Yeats
353. Sati, Christopher Pike
354. **The Inferno, Dante **
355. The Apology, Plato
356. The Small Rain, Madeline L'Engle
357. The Man Who Tasted Shapes, Richard E Cytowick
358. 5 Novels, Daniel Pinkwater
359. The Sevenwaters Trilogy, Juliet Marillier
360. Girl with a Pearl Earring, Tracy Chevalier
361. To the Lighthouse, Virginia Woolf
362. Our Town, Thorton Wilder
363. Green Grass Running Water, Thomas King
364. The Interpreter, Suzanne Glass
365. The Moor's Last Sigh, Salman Rushdie
366. The Mother Tongue, Bill Bryson
367. A Passage to India, E.M. Forster
368. The Perks of Being a Wallflower, Stephen Chbosky
369. The Phantom of the Opera, Gaston Leroux
370. Pages for You, Sylvia Brownrigg
371. The Changeover, Margaret Mahy
372. Howl's Moving Castle, Diana Wynne Jones
373. Angels and Demons, Dan Brown
374. Johnny Got His Gun, Dalton Trumbo
375. Shosha, Isaac Bashevis Singer
376. Travels With Charley, John Steinbeck
377. The Diving-bell and the Butterfly by Jean-Dominique Bauby
378. The Lunatic at Large by J. Storer Clouston
379. Time for bed by David Baddiel
380. Barrayar by Lois McMaster Bujold
381. Quite Ugly One Morning by Christopher Brookmyre
382. The Bloody Sun by Marion Zimmer Bradley
383. Sewer, Gas, and Eletric by Matt Ruff
384. Jhereg by Steven Brust
385. So You Want To Be A Wizard by Diane Duane
386. Perdido Street Station, China Mieville
387. The Tenant of Wildfell Hall, Anne Bronte
388. Road-side Dog, Czeslaw Milosz
389. The English Patient, Michael Ondaatje
390. Neuromancer, William Gibson
391. The Epistemology of the Closet, Eve Kosofsky Sedgwick
392. A Canticle for Liebowitz, Walter M. Miller, Jr
393. The Mask of Apollo, Mary Renault
394. The Gunslinger, Stephen King
395. Romeo and Juliet, William Shakespeare
396. Absalom, Absalom, William Faulkner
397. The Sun Also Rises, Ernest Hemingway
398. Dreamhouse, Alison Habens
399. Hyperion, by Dan Simmons
400. Prospero's Children, Jan Siegel
401. Gaudy Night, Dorothy Sayers
402. Guns, Germs, and Steel, Jared Diamond
403. Enchantment, Orson Scott Card
404. Cetaganda, Lois McMaster Bujold
405. Beauty, Sheri S. Tepper
406. The Hour of the Star, Clarice Lispector
407. The Patron Saint of Liars, Ann Patchett
408. Sexing the Cherry, Jeanette Winterson.
409. A wizard of Earthsea, Ursula Le'Guin.
410. Assassin's Apprentice, Robin Hobb.
411. The Axis Trilogy, Sara Douglass
412. Peter Pan, J. M. Barrie
413. Sabriel, Garth Nix
414. Neverwhere, Neil Gaiman
415. The Silence of the Lambs, Robert Harris
416. The Hot Zone, Richard Preston
417. Talking to High Monks in the Snow, by Lydia Minatoya
418. The Women of Brewster Place, by Gloria Naylor
419. Their Eyes were Watching God, by Zora Neale Hurston
420. The Secret Life of Bees, Sue Monk Bird
421. The DaVinci Code, Dan Brown
422. Slaughterhouse Five, Kurt Vonnegut
423. Hannibal, Thomas Harris
424. The Hours, Michael Cunningham
425. A Home At the End of the World, Michel Cunningham
426. Dangerous Angels, Francesca Lia Block
427. The Truth About Unicorns, Bonnie Jones Reynolds
428. L.I.E., David Hollander
429. The Iliad, Homer
430. Bel Canto, Anne Patchett
431. Terraforming Earth, Jack Williamson
432. Acts of Faith, Erich Segal
433. The Hottest State, Ethan Hawke
434. All Creatures Great and Small, James Herriot
435. Remember When, J. D. Robb/Nora Roberts
436. Broken Doll, (Can't remember author at the moment)
437. Belinda, Anne Rampling
438. Northanger Abbey, Jane Austen
439. Circle of Friends, Maeve Binchy
440. Middlesex, Jeffery Eugenides
441. When Rabbit Howls, The Troops for Trudy Chase.
442. We Were the Mulvaneys, Joyce Carol Oates
443. Cujo, Stephen King.
444. The Things They Carried, Tim O'Brien
445. Bats Out of Hell, Barry Hannah
446. The Remorseful Day, Colin Dexter
447. Therese Raquin, Emile Zola
448. Book of Famous Iowans, Douglas Bauer
449. Sex, Drugs & Cocoa Puffs: A Low Culture Manifesto, Chuck Klosterman
450. Restoration, Rose Tremain
451. The Andromeda Strain, Michael Crichton
452. Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil, John Berendt
453. The Time Traveler's Wife, Audrey Niffenegger
454. Confessions of an Ugly Stepsister, Gregory Maguire

Break. My. Heart.

I take I-90 to go to and from work, and pretty much every day, on my way home, there is a (I would say a homeless person, but I'm not entirely convinced that the people asking you for money are always homeless, so we'll say ...) beggar on the Addison off-ramp. It's not always the same guy - I've seen a few different guys during the time I've been taking this route - but which ever guy it is, he will usually do the same little routine. When the light has just turned red, he's standing right at the corner with his cup or sign or whatever method he's chosen to use. As soon as cars start to accumulate and come to a stop, he slowly walks down the sidewalk trying to catch eye contact with people so he can ask them for money. He'll get several cars down, and then, when the light turns green again and they start to move through the intersection, he'll turn around, walk back up to the corner and start the whole process again. One guy that spent quite a bit of time working that ramp had one of those hand-written signs. Out of curiosity, I would attempt to take a look at the sign so I could see what it said (if it told of his situation, or promised he wasn't going to use the money on alcohol, or what have you), but the writing was so small and scrawly that I could never make out anything more than "Please Help." If I tried to look harder at the sign, he would inevitably see me looking his direction and use it as an opportunity to come straight up to my car and ask me for money. Now don't get me wrong, I don't have anything against charity, but I don't like to give money to random people on the street because you really don't know what their situation is, or what they'll be using the money for. Having said that, it is much easier to simply avoid eye contact than to actually say "no" to a person asking you for money. And this is why I never found out what the rest of the guy's sign said. I still wonder. The last week or so, though, it's been a different guy. This guy is quite a bit younger, and doesn't have a sign, just a paper cup. A couple of days ago, I was sitting on the ramp and I was a bit farther back at the light, so he didn't get all the way up to my car before the light turned green. But as soon as it did turn green, Oh My God. He was on the curb next to the car in front of me and as we passed him by, he actually got down on his knee, holding his paper cup out in front of him and looked me straight in the eye - no avoidance was possible. Never before in my life had it made me so sad to not give money to someone on the street. I realize this was probably his intention all along, but seriously! I felt the pang in the pit of my stomach. Ouch.

And in other heartbreaking news ... yesterday while all the yucky wet stuff was falling from the sky (Storm? Hah!!) and the streets were sloppy and gross, I saw the saddest thing I've ever seen in my life. A single page from a coloring book, all colored in (a little blue and purple doggie), lay abandoned or lost, slightly crumpled, and very soggy on the sidewalk around the corner from my apartment. So sad. Poor doggie.

Bah

Sorry for the lack of posts, but I've been feeling kind of uninspired lately. Even though I've had lots on my mind, I haven't really been in the mood to write about it. I'm hoping for two things to happen in the near future, though, so perhaps, if and when they do happen, I will have something to write about. I can't guarantee that they will be good things, seeing as how things have been decidedly crappy lately, but news is news, right? And at this very moment, I could not disagree more with the phrase "no news is good news." I'll explain later.

Ciao!

Oh! One good thing to report -- I bought my ticket for Lollapalooza today!! Woo hoo!! And The Secret Machines are playing!! Woo hoo again!! Yay for super groovy 3-day outdoor music fests in my very own city! (Did I just say "groovy"? Wierd.)

maybe tomorrow I'll be happy

It's only 9 a.m. and I'm already having "one of those days." You know, one of those days when you're just tired of life. I'm tired of caring and feeling and being affected by the world around me. Today I wish I could turn off my brain and my emotions and just be a robot and go through my life doing what needs to be done and that's it. I'm tired of pain, physical and emotional, I'm tired of disappointment, of dissatisfaction, of caring about others who won't care about me, and of feeling like I'm trudging through mud just to make it to the end of the day. I'm afraid I'm going to break down one of these days and my body will completely fall apart and disintigrate. Best case scenario, it will make me numb to the world and I won't have to care anymore. I try to focus on the Self to relax and make the world go away, but it's harder that you'd think it would be to separate the Self from the people and the situations that surround it. Who are we without others? We are what we think, but aren't many of those thoughts put there by others? We are what we like, but aren't those things created by others? We are what we do, but aren't we doing those things for others?

I feel overwhelmed by thoughts and controlled by emotions and it makes me very tired. I need to shut down. Reboot. I need a long sleep. And I'll wake up when my brain is clear and my spirit enlightened.

Survey-Schmurvey

1: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, find line 4. Write down what it says:

The nearest book isn't numbered normally (1, 2, 3 ... 18, etc.), but if it were, this is what would be on p. 18:
"Description (DID), (DD Form 1664)."
From The Vital Link, a Data Management book. Fun stuff.

2: Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What do you touch first?

An almost-empty bottle of lotion

3: What is the last thing you watched on TV?

The first few minutes of The Daily Show.

4: WITHOUT LOOKING, guess what time it is:

10:06 a.m.

5: Now look at the clock, what is the actual time?

According to my computer, 10:10 a.m. According to my phone, 10:13 a.m. According to my watch, 10:13 a.m. I guess 10:13 wins.

6: With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?

A bunch of coworkers talking to people and on phones in the surrounding cubicles.

7: When did you last step outside?

Walking into work this morning.

8: Before you came to this website, what did you look at?

An article on Scientology on Wikipedia. Morbid curiosity.

9: What are you wearing?

Brand new khaki pants, a brand new coral colored polo shirt, an old ratty tan sweater, brown boots, and my work badge.

10: Did you dream last night?

Yes siree. I had a dream about a new American Idol contestant named Craig who was a little boy with some serious issues. I was trying to get him kicked off the show for being extremely perverted. Very disturbing dream.

11: When did you last laugh?

Before the Scientology article, I was reading an article on Discordianism. It made me laugh many times.

12: What is on the walls of the room you are in?

I have Herman Miller walls!! :) Let's see, on the walls there is a giant 2006 calendar, a Product Support dept. directory, some Post-Its, my March data submittal schedules, a dry erase board that never gets used because I don't have a marker for it, my CM/DM study group schedule, pictures of family and friends, and a dried flower I received from a coworker last fall. Oh, and my coat hanging on a hook. And a VPP Team button (don't ask).

13: Seen anything weird lately?

Crash won Best Picture. That was pretty weird.

14: What do you think of this quiz?

You know I loves the quizzies.

15: What is the last film you saw?

In the theater - The Chronicles of Narnia. On DVD - I [heart] Huckabees

16: If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy first?

I'd pay off debts, and probably buy a new car. Then I'd make sure my parents were taken care of so they can go ahead and retire already!!

17: Tell me something about you that I don't know:

That who doesn't know? The reader of this survey? Well, that could be anyone. I don't think there's anything about me that NOBODY knows, but something that isn't widely known is that when I was 5 and my little brother was born, I started wetting the bed (jealous of the attention perhaps?). But we're even because when I was 13 and got Sick (capital-S Sick, meaning the Takayasu's Arteritis), my bro started acting like a crazy person. Again, the attention thing.

18: If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?

Say bye-bye to organized religion. I know this is an unpopular opinion, and I really don't mean to open up a can of worms here. It's just that everyone thinks that their religion is "right" while every other religion is "wrong." This has caused so much discord in the world that I'd like to see what would happen if we just got rid of it altogether. Spirituality, fine. Religion, nuh-uh.

19: Do you like to dance?

I like to dance alone in my apartment when I can be as goofy as I please, but I tend not to like dancing in places where dancing is generally practiced.

20: Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?

Daisy

21: Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?

Roman

22: Would you ever consider living abroad?

Who wouldn't? Not that I've ever actually been abroad ...

23: Will you pass on this survey?

I'm passing it on into the Void, instead of bombarding my friends with another inbox-filler.

Okay, okay

So, I only posted the last post an hour ago and already I feel guilty for being so negative. I mean, I really do feel like my whole body is in a vice, but I don't need to subject everyone else to my misery. So here are some other thoughts for the day that are a bit less dismal.

First off, I had a wierd dream last night. And it was especially wierd because even though I kept waking up and looking at the clock (yeah, one of those nights), the dream continued from where it left off when I fell back asleep. It started out where I was on a bike ride with some friends from work out in a small town in the middle of nowhere. We stopped at this empty building to rest a while and suddenly I was on a mission to pick up a friend of my brother's at the airport. Apparently there was a small airport in this town that I could get to by bike. Well, for some reason, my Dad was there and was asking where I was going but I couldn't tell him, so he hid outside the building and when I left to go to the airport on my bike, he followed me on his. I saw him out of the corner of my eye, but he didn't know that I had seen him (he was trying to be stealthy), so I tried to lose him, which I did, but only temporarily. Eventually I arrived at this airport and found the girl, who said she was my brother's girlfriend. And then my brother himself showed up with this other girl who I thought was his girlfriend, and it's all confusing, and then my Dad finally showed up once he figured out where I went and he was all confused as well. Anyway, we all had to get home from the airport but we didn't want to ride our bikes anymore because suddenly there was a ton of snow on the ground, so we found an abandoned pick up truck, which only sort of worked (it sputtered and kept dying on us), but it managed to get the lot of us home safely. Then something happened involving sleeping bags, and I think there was a carnival, but I can't remember any of that.

It was very strange. But I guess you had to be there. :)

And another thing that just popped into my head ... I really dislike the phrase "fix dinner." Not only does it invoke images of a disgruntled housewife performing the daily drudgery of making dinner for a family, but why do you need to "fix" dinner? Is it broken? I'm sure I'm not the first person to ever ask this question, but it just doesn't make sense. And something about that phrase just sounds so tedious and old-fashioned. I prefer "cook dinner" or even "make dinner." In my life, I swear I will never, ever "fix" dinner. If it ain't broke ...

And I'm spent.
H

Crappity-Crap

I feel awful. Physically. I feel worn out, and even though most of the symptoms of my cold are gone, I have this horrible, horrible pain in the center of my chest and back (mostly my back, actually). Everyone seems to think it is a lingering symptom of my cold (my doctor included), and I hope they're right. I hate to think I have any other wierd diseases on top of the one wierd disease I already have. My Mom even says she's had this pain before and it eventually goes away. I reeeeeeally hope it goes away. And soon. Sometimes it hurts so bad it makes me want to cry.

On a related note, I will be going in for another MRI soon to check on my aortic arch, in hopes that the inflammation has stayed down with the decrease in Prednisone dosage. Here's hoping. Though with this crippling pain in the core of my body right now, I find it hard to be optimistic about anything. Add to that, the increasingly intense wisdom tooth pain that I will need to get checked out soon, the unexplained pain in the back of one side of my neck that insists on keeping me up at night, and the sharp pain behind my right shoulder blade that has been plaguing me for months and shows no sign of letting up.

Hate to be a complainer, but yeah, it sucks to be me right now. I hurt.